Friday, April 1, 2016

Tears in April

I took a walk last night and found a bench overlooking a pond near my apartment. 
With classical music streaming on my phone, I decided to take a seat, enjoy the light breeze and contemplate life, (and the realization that April is here and I haven't finished my taxes). 
It wasn't long before the worries flooding my mind were replaced with thoughts of my first love, Jonathan Monis. 
Jon (who I called "Mo"), died six Aprils ago... on the 13th. 
We were in college. 
I'll never forget that day, when my brother called and told me the news. 
Thoughts of Jon opened the door to memories of my dear Giulia, another friend who made the trip to heaven when we were just 15 years old. 
I started thinking about what they'd be like if they were still here. 
Would Giulia be a veterinarian like her dad? What about Mo? Would he have straightened out and got a big job in finance? 
The tears started...  
That empty space tucked deep in my heart was exposed again. 
I saw Giulia's face, her beautiful blonde hair and blue eyes,  remembered our talks on the swing set, our battles with head lice in elementary school, the excitement of playing pranks on our first crushes. 
Then I heard Jon's voice..his jokes... how he would literally make me PEE MY PANTS from laughing so hard.
I don't think I'll ever meet anyone as funny as him.
I remembered our first was on a bench near my parents house, under the stars.

I started talking to them, praying...whatever you want to call it. 
Believing they could hear me brought peace to my heart. 
I told them I loved them. 
I then wiped the tears and headed back home.

Tonight I'm writing this on my phone, sitting inside Whole Foods waiting for the rain to stop. 
My friend Michelle is visiting this weekend and I only have almond milk in my refrigerator.

I was just sitting next to a beautiful young girl.
She was probably 17, pretty blonde hair and I complimented her on her flip flops. 
She told me she got them in Greece while on vacation. 
"I was there for two months this past summer" I quickly replied. 
We then started sharing stories, and before she left she complimented me on my hair (I just got it cut so the rats nest is tame). 
She reached for my hand and asked for my name. 
"Kristin," I said with a smile- so impressed with her maturity and kind heart. 
"Julia" she replied. 
"That was my best friends name...she passed away when we were young," I told her. 
Julia compassionately said she was sorry, and then with a big smile said, 
"Maybe Giulia is coming back and she says she likes your hair!"
My eyes welled up with tears. 
The happy kind. 


  1. that brings tears to my eyes. im jack wagon,facebook follower of fox 35 and just about everyone on there.

  2. oh my gosh. what a beautiful story. Tears and happiness. You have been visited by your friends in heaven. Heaven is never that far away. God bless you. Thank you for sharing your life with us.

    1. God Bless you too Kristine! Thank you so much for your message <3

  3. This is very much a heartwarming story, Kristin. You are a sensitive, caring soul and it shines through brightly in your writing. It's wonderful to have you back on the air in Orlando!

    1. Thank you so much David. I'm very grateful to be back :)

  4. I was thinking of Giulia last week at the Easter Vigil. I remember how excited she was. I looked up and saw her parents sitting across the way from me.

  5. Your heart is so loving & full. You told me about Giulia while we were waiting for the show to start at Medieval Times in Orlando on a RRHS field trip years ago. Your memories made her live then, and she lives in your words now. Once more your words bring to life someone who has passed on that I did not know - Mo -and once again, a friend of yours seems alive to me. Keep remembering. Keep sharing. Keep loving & learning. ♥️

    1. Thank you so much Mrs. O'Connell. I remember that trip and our conversation :) Love you so much <3

  6. Very Emotional Kristen, Im so sorry

  7. Very Emotional Kristen, Im so sorry